“Happy birthday preeti, now it’s time to start looking for a nice boy” said my mother on my 23rd birthday. That’s right…23rd. She went off on the inevitable monologue of the importance of getting married at a ‘good young age’. My counter argument- I am building a career, was dismissed as not a priority as “a job will always be there, but marriage isn’t always guaranteed”. That’s when I realised, I had been told to study and get a degree, now I had one, it was on to the next ‘tick box exercise’ on the list. But, similar to most people my age (33) I didn’t stand for it.
The Sikh community is one in which culture and religion are often so interlinked that differentiating between the two becomes impossible. Being single and above the age of 30 is often seen as a ‘failure’ and probably a sign that there must be something ‘wrong’. However, this is much more about culture than it is what our Guru’s taught us. Yes, a Gristi Jeevan (householders’ life) is important. So is developing your relationship with yourself, with your Guru and becoming a helpful part of the community. For most of us, we only get to embark on the journey of self-discovery after our 20’s. Am I right?
Therefore, it’s never too late to get married but it can be too early. Take your time in developing yourself and you‘ll know when you’re ready for the next step.
Lavaan is a platform where men and women can get to know each other with the intention of getting married. Lavaan encourages people to spend time getting to know themselves first before embarking on the journey of looking for a life partner. Become the best version of you so that when you do sign up, you’ll be ready to meet the right person for you.